One time, years ago, I was absolutely furious when a man I had a date with canceled 20 minutes AFTER he was supposed to pick me up.

Normally, I wouldn’t be bothered by something like this because I ALWAYS have a “plan B” and will be out the door within a half-hour with whoever “Mr. B” is, and funny enough, it always turns out to be even more fun than the original date would have been.

Ce la vie. A Pair and a Spare dating plan and all that.

But this particular date was special because not only were we going to the annual Cloisters Medieval Faire, an event I look forward to each year because I see fellow costume designers I rarely ever see and marvel at (and get inspired by) their fabulous, clever outfits, but I had created the most amazing matching King & Queen of the Forest Faerie outfits for us!

I had worked on our costumes for more than a month, painstakingly sewing (by hand) and gluing and arranging thousands of jewels and feathers and flowers and sticks and gorgeous little doodads. I had even found him a long, thick, heavy wool, AUTHENTIC, royal purple cape to match mine.

Our outfits were royal and regal and magnificent.

The colors were stunning; dark purple and royal blue. And the headpieces were at least 5 feet tall and wide.

Absolutely exquisite.

Yeah, I’m not so humble about it. I worked my f*ing ass off creating these elaborate costumes and it would be the first time I had made matching outfits to wear with someone, and I’d spent a shitload of money not only on his beautiful king’s robe, but this was the first time I did not hold back and splurged on expensive ostrich feathers, sparkly jewels, and stunning embroidery.

Plus, I live in Brooklyn, and everyone knows I’m not a subway girl, so paying for an Uber was going to be crazy f*ing expensive as well.

So, I sat there for a few minutes, fuming. I put aside my costume, not wanting to wear it now that the “king” wasn’t going to be strutting around at my side, and I did what any damn good costume maker would do;

I made another one.

Yup. I took out every single one of my plastic bins and sequins and fabrics and glue guns, and I started to create a whole other costume.

Normally, it takes me weeks and sometimes months to create something new. And I always make something new. God forbid I wear the same costume twice. 🙂

Within a few hours, I was dressed and ready to go. Alone, but I knew I would see my friends there. And since most of them always show up late in the afternoon anyway, I would be just in time.

While I was preening and posing for photos, I met the most charming man, and we took this photo together.

He was gorgeous. And, I LOVED HIS SHIRT!

I knew that my original date would see my photos on Facebook, and I was thrilled to post this one with my new friend.

I wanted that little shit to see me smiling and laughing and flirting with my new “King”…my new “Daddy”, and I hoped that bastard would be seething with jealousy.

He was.

Yeah, I can be immature and childish and petty. I’m flawed, but damn can I create some costumes.

Anyway, I love this photo.

It reminds me of the joy I felt that my original date never knew that my “Plan B” was not only very sexy, very sweet, and very handsome, but very happily gay!

And I had a ball posing with him and his boyfriend and all my other costume designer friends that day.

My motto?

Plan B, or, always have a backup “boyfriend” when the main one f*cks up. Especially if he’s wearing a scandalous t-shirt that says “Daddy” on it!

Have you ever been stood up, or had an important event that your date canceled? What do you think of having a Plan B, or, A Pair and a Spare when I comes to dating? Comment below!


☑ Book your flight:  My absolute favorite sites for cheap flights are Skiplagged and I also find really great deals on Skyscanner, Google Flights, and Momondo. The reason I’ve been able to get dirt cheap flights around the world is that I’m flexible, not only with travel dates but also with airlines, baggage, seat choices, etc.

☑ Book your accommodation: I always use Airbnb and If you’re on a budget, consider using  Hostelworld. If you click on the Airbnb link and you don’t have an account yet – you’ll get a $30 discount on your first booking.

☑ Protect yourself: Yes, I mean condoms, girl. But also, travel insurance. Travel insurance is a must, especially in a post coronavirus pandemic world. World Nomads and SafetyWing offer the best rates. 

☑  Do you need a visa? If you aren’t sure if you need a visa, it would be a smart idea to take a quick look before you go. You can use iVisa – it’s super useful and easy to use.


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Ok, let me be honest, I would consider taking their money, but 1. Google hates that so it’s “illegal” and 2. The heffers only offer me between $25-100, and these hookers can afford so much more, so I just quote them “$22,222 per sponsored post.

Anyway, for all you guys from Morocco, Egypt, India and all you Nigerian Princes who tell me you love me and want to marry me before you even learn my name, y’all can pay for the $20 a month membership.

*If I get enough of you subscribing at that tier, I might even post some of my more scandalous photos. I’ll even reply back to you once in a while.

**And any Zaddies in the house, yes, I am open to getting free flights. My Paypal is @travelriter.

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I rarely send newsletters. I’ll be honest, I’m a lazy f*ck.

Alright, that’s not really true. Actually, I don’t send many emails (yet…I will one day) for the same reason I’m not good at being a “Fatal Attraction” type of stalker. I just do not have the damn time.

I prefer focusing on writing content rather than sending emails, but in the future, I intend to make more time, both for emails and stalking men who have ghosted me.

For now, I will send the rare email when there’s such a damn good deal that I HAVE to let you guys know about it (like one penny flights, seriously)! So subscribe now and I promise; no spam shitty emails.

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